My friend Johan has transitioned into the arms of his Father and into the eternal dance of Love in the early hours of 30 June 2024. I flew to Cape Town to say my farewells and had an experience of Love's presence that I will carry with me for the rest of my days.
I ended my previous blog with this paragraph: "Dig deep now, old friend, in this valley of tears. Speak to your heartbroken soul, take courage, and remember the promises our Papa gave us through the years. Penetrate the veil of your mind and break free from the bubble of self you wished to escape for so many years."
I believe the ICU journey for him and his family, which lasted sixteen days and seventeen nights, represented his final journey. He completed it exactly forty years after we embarked on another life journey to an unknown destination together.
I started this blog soon after Johan's passing but could not complete it because my own grief surprised me. The pain was very real, and although I expected it, there was an element I could not fathom. As I was writing, I was overcome by a grief that somehow surpassed my personal loss. I have lost a dear friend, but I have realised that the grief was also for the journey we traveled together and the sadness that we never seemed to have arrived at our destination.
But did we perhaps arrive at the beginning of a new season?
The season in which we met Johan and Linda du Toit was likely one of the most transformative and prophetic times of our lives. It was a God-ordained period that propelled us into a new prophetic experience, revealing aspects of God and of God's purpose that transformed our thinking.
On the very night, forty years ago that we met our new neighbours, Johan prayed for my wife and me for the "baptism in the Holy Spirit" and two weeks later, he baptised us in our own pool. During that turbulent time, both families knew that we were called to embark on a journey together. We responded with hope and trepidation but we were willing to follow wherever we were led.
This is how I remember the beginning of that journey. On June 29, 1984, a small group of us traveled to Durban to attend a meeting where the prophet Roger Teale would speak. We were eagerly hoping for a prophetic word about the future of our lives and ministries. We did receive an incredibly accurate word that night that changed our lives and called us to establish a work in Ladysmith together. The Du Toit's and the Vosloo's were connected in God’s purposes from that day onward This marked our crossing of the Red Sea and the beginning of our desert journey.
The first meeting of the new “fellowship” took place in our lounge two days later on July 1, 1984—the first day of the seventh month, a day of new beginnings. We offered our lives, our families, and everything we had to the Lord. Although we were sincere, we did not fully understand the true nature of the call we received that weekend. A significant rhema word given to us that day was from Ezra 3:6 (NKJV): “From the first day of the seventh month they began to offer burnt offerings to the Lord, although the foundation of the temple of the Lord had not been laid.”
On that Sunday, the first day of the seventh month, we sacrificed and celebrated in our lounge with a few others, knowing only one thing: we were called, like Ezra, to oversee the rebuilding of some "Temple". We interpreted our calling as building a physical work in Ladysmith and saw our destiny, the Promised Land, as a revival in our town that would touch the whole country.
Unbeknownst to us, the three weeks preceding July 1, 1984, prepared us for a forty-year journey through the desert. During this time in the desert, we had to relinquish our slave mentality, our desire to control outcomes, our efforts to please God through sacrifices, and especially our self-reliance and self-centered worldview.
We had a typical desert experience, marked by seasons of famine and abundance. We witnessed miracles, signs, and wonders. We struggled with surrender, community, time constraints, jealousy, and difficult people. Above all, we learned how to work together, forgive, and love one another. For forty years, we had to learn to rely on morning manna and evening quail to survive. We barely survived sometimes. But there were seasons of abundance and joy and fruitfulness.
Through the years of our desert experience, we slowly realized that our calling was not to build a church or an edifice for God. Instead, we were called to ascend into the high places where God resides—the unseen realms where prophets dwell. As we grew in that understanding, we were slowly released from the bondages of our own illusion about our calling and imperceptibly drifted into the real purposes of God.
Both Johan and I gradually realized that our Promised Land was an undefined state of being, not a ministry or a position or even a revival. We learned this while eventually pursuing different visions in different locations. We discovered that the bond between us and our common journey was not dependent on physical proximity. It was a connection in an unseen realm that kept us closely linked.
On June 30, 2024, exactly forty years after our journey began that weekend in 1984, my friend left us and passed into the Promised Land. He had completed his journey; he had finished his race. Though I would have loved to still have him here, I understand that his passing holds profound prophetic significance. Together we have had glimpses of the Promised Land of unconditional love, but we were not to experience it together in this life.
On July 1, 2024, I realized it was the first day of the seventh month again, exactly forty years later and that I was worshipping in my lounge. This time, I was alone, but the presence of God was real, and the peace was like a river.
What happened to our calling? Perhaps we crossed the Jordan while we were sleeping and crying and praying during the night of the 30th. I realised that I did not feel any different but is it possible we have reached a new milestone on our journey? Maybe I am experiencing a day of new beginnings? Perhaps the foundation of the Temple was laid during these forty years in the desert and those of us who remain can now begin to inhabit the Promised Land of unconditional, sacrificial love? Maybe that will be the privilege of the next generation and we built the bridge?
I can still feel him with me as I write. I wish I could experience the reality of the Love we sought for all these years in the desert with him in this life. But I know we will be building this new temple of Love together. There will be a special dispensation of grace that will make it much easier from now on. That is the nature of Promised Lands.
Early in May 2024, I received this scripture from The Passion Translation, and I knew that a new season was approaching. I didn’t make the connection with the forty years until the morning of the first day of the seventh month:
"The one I love calls to me: Arise, my dearest. Hurry, my darling. Come away with me! I have come as you have asked to draw you to my heart and lead you out. For now is the time, my beautiful one. The season has changed, the bondage of your barren winter has ended, and the season of hiding is over and gone ....
Can you not discern this new day of destiny breaking forth around you? The early signs of my purposes and plans are bursting forth. The budding vines of new life are now blooming everywhere. The fragrance of their flowers whispers, “There is change in the air.”
(Song of Songs 2:10-13)
My old friend, may we discover that the foundation laid in our lives and the lives of those we love during the last forty years is strong enough to handle the outpouring of God’s love we have been waiting for. May those who follow us be swept up in that effortless flow of the love we have been seeking together.
One thing I know is that you are now in the river of that love. You are experiencing firsthand everything we spoke and prayed about for so many years. You have pierced the ego-bubble, and wherever you are now, you are dancing in the freedom of unconditional acceptance. I can’t wait to join you, so many loved ones who have preceded your own enlightenment, and your beloved Holy Trinity in that dance.
You now know what real life and real love is, and I raise a toast to your very prophetic life and death, my friend.
L’chaim!
Thank you so much, Janet. What I've learned most in the past few weeks is the true nature of the spiritual promised land. It’s a place where Love is received and expressed amidst the challenging conditions of this earthly realm. Thank you for the love you show in your most challenging situation.
What an exquisite tribute to a holy friendship! How fortunate you were to share such a profound journey. Few are so blessed. Thank you for sharing this with us, Stephan. Your words enrich and nourish and give glory to the most high. I can only dream of following yours and Johann's footsteps! Amen.